the ladder

i am not sure why, but i seem to be taking things so literally these days. seeing only what’s in front of me at the moment… or strategizing about decisions i cannot make, like buying shoes or shirts or relocating across the country. it’s nullifying my capacity for abstract thinking. even my dreams and nightmares are literal. reality dreaming.

this morning i dreamed it was the first day at my new job. And my boss was giving me a pop quiz to see if i knew what i was doing… if i had the skills i claimed i had at my job interview (which i do not).  And then my friend JC appeared, and she was working there, too. I asked her if she could help me, but she seemed reluctant. i think she told me that i should be able to figure things out, at my salary. even though she was earning $10,000 more. I guess she may have wanted my job. i had never seen her so bitter, or bitter at all.

and then she was helping me pick up a ladder somewhere, i’m not sure where. but we seemed to be in a hurry to take it wherever we were supposed to take it. i think we may have managed to get there.

And when I awakened, i had the sense that one has when awakening from a disturbing nightmare. it all felt so literal. except for why JC was appearing. except for the ladder.

About The Lost Pedestrian

In my wanderings throughout the moments/days/years, I try in earnest to find the mystical within the mundane and the mundane within the mystical, oftentimes confusing one from the other. I have wandered and roamed through many a city, many a town, in a state of wonder and bewilderment, without necessarily going anywhere. I am easily lost, but eventually found. (I am guessing you have just found me). My sincere hope is that you will find Something in this warehouse of thought, memory and false memory, words, numbers, tangents, murmurs, echoes (lots and lots of echoes), voices, dreams, and other paraphernalia.
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One Response to the ladder

  1. JC Mitchell says:

    I have no idea why I was bitter, as even $10,000 is close to what I currently earn. Perhaps I was irritated about the ladder being in the way. In our tiny cramped house we have finally, after months and months, cleared a space so that we can fit a nice Yamaha electric piano that I’m going to borrow from a friend, so that I can once again play music and fill my heart with joy. But there is still a ladder in the way. So thanks for helping me move the ladder. Things will be much better for both of us now.

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