I was envious of you and not pleased about it. Far from pleased. Very very far from pleased. I wish I could be just as far away from this envy as I am from pleased.

Because you write voluminously and you have the discipline to write. And I write sparingly and lack in discipline.

Because people notice you. While I remain invisible to most. Except for those who I would rather not be visible to.

Was that even a sentence?

Because you have had so many lovers. While you rejected me as a potential lover.

Because you are so boundlessly talented. Awesomely talented. I freeze before your talent. But I do not cower. And I do not bow. But perhaps I should bow as a proper show of respect.

Because you seem to remember everything about everybody while I am too self-consumed to notice very much beyond my narrow range of noticing.

Because I wish I could be you.

But I don’t wish I could be exactly you.

I guess there are a couple things about you I would rather not be. I just have not put my finger on it. just yet.