Autumn Inn

an overflow of unfortunate decisions and nondecisions that began at

1:00 a.m when I suddenly had an urgency to create a short video piece that I for whatever reason I just had to post on Facebook at that moment… or else.

1:45 a.m. video completed and posted to facebook

2:30 a.m. made it to bed.

3:30 a.m. could not fall asleep because I was too cold. it was freezing, but the owner of the house had just scolded me for using too much heat.

4:30 a.m. finally fell asleep after adding an extra layer, one of which was a down parka.

10:00 a.m. stumbled out of bed, ate oatmeal, and began to pack up for my one day trip to Northampton to meet with a gallery director about my performance proposal … and then spend the night at a hotel, and then go on a short hike somewhere around there the next day.

11:00 a.m. began packing for my one night stay

12:15 p.m. finally finished packing. I have no idea why it took so long.

12:30 tried to go to the organic grocery store to pick up lunch but there was no parking to be found. I could have easily just walked there

12:45 continued driving down Centre Street for lunch at a mediocre diner where I knew I would find parking.

1:45 left the diner and headed out to Northampton, at least 90 minutes late. Emailed the gallery director to tell her I would be running late. I offered to reschedule if this was an inconvenience, but since she didn’t respond, I thought everything would be find.

3:45 arrived at the gallery. The gallery director asked why I was so late. She did not say hello or thank me for coming, things that I would expect a human to do. I told her the traffic was slow leaving Boston, which I guess was partially true. I did not tell her that it was personal traffic that had nothing to do with driving. Then she said that she only had a few minutes. I showed her a couple of excerpts from the performance and I could tell she had absolutely no interest. But that did not deter me from showing her a second excerpt.

She said she would get back to me in a few weeks. I am guessing I will never hear from her again. Which is fine because life is too short to have people like intruding upon it.

4:30 went to a coffee joint. the staff was hip and unfriendly. the place was packed, no empty tables, but I stood around because I had nowhere else to go. Eventually found a table. And I thought, maybe it’s time to look into where I am going to stay tonight because I still had not made a reservation. I could not find anything online in my price range that did not look depressing. So I went on Priceline, bid $60 on a “3 star” hotel. My bid was rejected. Tried another bid at $80, which became $97 adding in tax. My bid was accepted and it showed that I would be staying at the Autumn Inn. Read read some of the user reviews, mainly people saying that it was a 1 star hotel at the very max. The photos were equally dismal.

I thought that maybe I should just swallow the $97 loss and try to look at it as a speeding ticket, and head “home.” But then I was so angry at myself for my poor judgement, I decided that I deserved to spend the night there. And besides that, if I stayed, I could get up early and hike somewhere beautiful, which was actually my excuse for traveling there. the gallery was secondary. And then, refreshed and exhilarated from my hike, I could drive drive to Boston in time for my late afternoon OKcupid date. But then I thought how nice it would be wake up and already be in Boston, and then I could just wander around this park in Cambridge I hear is so beautiful.

But then I thought, c’mon… what’s one night in a shitty hotel? Why am I so spoiled?

And this went on back and forth, back and forth.

6:00 Dinner at a falafel place, quite good actually. since they had wi-fi, I continued to look online for any clues from the universe as to whether I should stay or head back.

6:45 Decided to stay. Went back to the coffee joint to continue my online research and use the bathroom. It was closed. So I walked over to “State Street Fruit” which was actually a liquor store with a small produce section. I asked if I could use their bathroom. The cashier told me I could not and suggested that I go to the coffee joint.

I thought, I think I’ll be OK to hang on until I arrive at the hotel. But I had forgotten where I had parked. In absolute desperation, I found found a small alley with some bushes between the back of an Indian restaurant and a real estate office that appeared to be closed. I went, undetected.

7:40 Located my car.

7:44 drove up and down Elm Street in search of the Autumn Inn. It took several passes before I finally found it. I thought I could at least give the room a chance…  and then I could decide if it was tolerable or not. Just give a chance, I told myself. Is that too much to ask?

8:00 arrived at the hotel room. it was even more depressing than I thought. I think the empty old rocking chair in the corner really got to me for some reason. I anticipated a night of nightmares. just very bad vibes about the hotel… And then the loud stomping of the hotel guests above me. the universe seemed to be telling me something.

8:30 got back in my car and headed “home.” most of the trip somehow managing not to think about this squandered day and squandered money.

10:30 arrived “home.” i tried to find the positives. the people at the falafel place were nice.


About The Lost Pedestrian

In my wanderings throughout the moments/days/years, I try in earnest to find the mystical within the mundane and the mundane within the mystical, oftentimes confusing one from the other. I have wandered and roamed through many a city, many a town, in a state of wonder and bewilderment, without necessarily going anywhere. I am easily lost, but eventually found. (I am guessing you have just found me). My sincere hope is that you will find Something in this warehouse of thought, memory and false memory, words, numbers, tangents, murmurs, echoes (lots and lots of echoes), voices, dreams, and other paraphernalia.
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